Monday, April 25, 2011

Infertility Awareness Week

Infertility affects 1 in 8 couples.  When we first started to try and get pregnant, I never in my wildest dreams imagine that we would be where we are today- on the road to IVF.  The concept of having difficulties trying to get pregnant seemed ridiculous.  My sister got pregnant on her first month of trying with my niece.  Even after we had been trying for a few months, she was pregnant with number 2, my nephew, within a month or two.  So why was this taking so long for us?

A few months of trying quickly turned into a year.  We had told some friends and family that we wanted to start a family and were getting questioned as to what was taking so long.  Now here is one of those myths that was told to me over and over again- just stop trying and it'll happen.  Ha.  That didn't work either.  It's like people were implying that I was doing something to wreck my chances of getting pregnant by trying.  It amazed me how many times I was told to just go on vacation or get drunk and it will happen.  It still didn't happen.  We started talking about our struggles with fewer and fewer people because we were getting sick of being judged and hearing completely ridiculous "advice."  I use the word advice in quotes because I never asked for advice but apparently everyone had something to say. 

We were officially diagnosed with MFI after about 10 months of trying to get pregnant.  And yes I used the word diagnosed.  Here is another myth- infertility isn't a disease.  It's too bad that many people don't see it that way.  We were given the diagnosis that Matt had a low sperm count and low motility.  Suddenly our private, intimate moments became public knowledge to the doctors we began to see.  We were fortunate enough to have insurance coverage on our first year of treatment with IUI's and numerous meds.  We even switched insurances so that we could pursue IVF with 3 rounds being covered.  It's a shame that most insurances do not see infertility as a medical diagnosis.  Trust me, we did not and would never choose this route in our journey to start our family.

We haven't shared much of our infertility journey with many people.  Our parents and siblings, some friends and some new friends met through an infertility support group are the only ones aware of what we have and will be going through.  Maybe someday I'll be brave enough to share our struggles in a more public way.  I admire those that are strong enough to do so.  I don't want that "advice" from people anymore.  I don't want to be continually asked questions about our treatment.  I don't want pity.  What I truly want to is start my family and for people to understand exactly what infertility is. 


  1. My infertility is a disease caused by another disease - cancer. I so wish people in general would be more understanding about infertility. I really liked this post - visiting from ICLW. I look forward to reading more from you!

  2. Hi, visiting from ICLW. I am so sorry to hear you are having a difficult time TTC. It's hard to feel hope when after all your efforts you are still in the same place you started.

    I am wishing you luck on this journey and I look forward to following your journey.

    You are not alone and are surrounded and supported by all of us :)

    Babysteps #51

  3. Glad to meet you! Over from ICLW and wanted to offer my support. I am right there with you on this myth! It's one of the most frustrating ones out there.
    Blogging is such a wonderful outlet and I am happy to have found amazing women online to relate to.
    Come visit me!

    It looks as if there is another IF lady with my blog name! Small world!